Name, Age, Gender, Ice Cream Preference...

IN JOBS THAT SHOULD JUST GO AWAY:

I appreciated the directness and brevity of this junk offer:

Thursday, July 29, 2010 4:18 AM

From: "Melva Rue"

To: Undisclosed-recipients

Subject: Your Email ID has been Winner £1,000,000.00 in the British Promo send your:


Names...Country...Address....Occupation...Tel....Sex.....

--

Aimee...Canada...Onehundredjobs.ca....100Job...5144720185....Often.....



I worked all morning at a photo shoot with Latsch Studios in Old Montreal and then all afternoon on a pitch video with Social Media Montreal for a prospective fashion client, so I am spent.  I'm super in need of a relaxing Girl's Day Out in Laval tomorrow.

Until then, please send me your names....country....se....


Aimee.

Aichmophobia, Bathophobia, Freakophobia!

Today, while in Sutton during Job 49, I connected with my inner phobic urban princess and decided that I will never work professionally as a construction worker, even if I adore my lovely bosses with all my heart and soul and modeling.

My aichomophobia (fear of sharp sh*t) combined with my bathophobia (fear of flying with Erica Jong off of scaffolding) and bandsawholyfucobia prevents me from ever setting a hypervigilant, manicured toe on a building site ever again. I have a newfound respect for both builders and BUILDINGS everywhere.  Someone had to cry in their heads for weeks on end to get that snazz built!

Cage of horrors and adrenaline junkies via ileadscaffolding.

Here's a little unedited teaser video of my inner freak out at the beautiful construction site today:

I still have sawdust in my bellybutton and on other pinkish bits... LOL!  Free exfoliation after playing chicken with your digits!!  WHOO!

Someone needs a bath and a hug therapy session sleep,

Aimee.

P.S. Interesting little blog post about fear and woodworking.  Even manly men with woodworking desires have issues with saws that they need to overcome! OkayI'mawussy.holdme.

P.P.S. VOTE FOR ME EVERY DAY WITH EVERY E-MAIL! HOW CAN I LOSE TO SOME FROGFREAK WHO WANTS TO SWIM WITH AMPHIBIANS? DO NOT LET THIS HAPPEN. I LOVE YOU. REALLY. PLEASE?!?!?!

Prepping to Get Dirty AND Pretty

I spent all morning planning for Job 49 tomorrow as an honorary construction worker at Claude and Manon's new house in Sutton, Quebec (including finding good boots instead of heels, Bjodoin! ;) and locking down my pampering schedule for my Girl's Day Out in Laval, Quebec.

Here's my much anticipated Friday itinerary for what I will now call "The Laval BFF Experience", as Tara Hunt will be joining me in what is sure to be a feminine and indulgent experience:

11h Call time at Spa Orazio; Meeting with Les Effrontés Stylists.
12h Manicures, facials, hair, and make-up at Orazio.
15h Break for checking into the Sheraton and shopping at Carrefour Laval
17h15 Photo shoot at Magenta Photo Studio Laval
19h30 Dinner at Le Tire Bouchon Parisien Bistro
22h00 Pillow fight.
 
On the day of our Laval BFF Experience, they are going to take me from this:

To this:

Image via Scrape.tv

That's what happens in Laval,



AimeeganFox

Job 49: Construction Chica!

I'm proud to announce Job 49: working as a construction lady woman doctor worker for a day!

 Zexy tools via Photos.com

The job invite:


Subject: Are you looking for a construction job for 100$?              
From: Claude Dagenais www.twohumans.com
To: Aimée‎ Davison
Date: Sun, Jul 25, 2010 at 10:07 AM

Hello there Aimee,

As you know, we are building our house and we are always looking for good workers ;-)

Let us know if you are up to it. This week we are working outside with my brother and Manon's sisters. Next week we are back with our construction workers. The crew would probably get a kick of having you on the construction site but they are working real hard too, so we try to helps them the best we can without getting in their way. Look at the images below. Since we are in the rough phase, the work is the most impressive visually right now. If you are interested, please come to the site in Sutton!

If you come, please bring gloves, good boots (not high heels, steel cap), and if you have it a hard hat - if you don't we will try to supply you one.

P.S. You will be our first and probably last illegal worker(!)

We will talk to you soon,

Claude & Manon

That has to be the best looking construction site I've ever seen, but then again Claude and Manon are awesome photographers.  Some examples of our past stock photography work together:

 My $500 badass leather jacket, thankyouverymuch. 

I will kick your ass at the rat race, 'mkay?

I found him attractive: was it obvious?

I'm a serene and happy Blogger, m'kay?

Speaking of satisfied Bloggers, I'm crazy happy to announce as well that 3 Angels Marketing (Thanks, Karima-Catherine!) and Tourism Laval picked me as an official blogger to review their pampering services AND their attractions for parents of young children!  I'll be heading over to Laval on Friday for the Girl's Day Out (Journée de Filles) to Spa Orazio, Magenta Photo Studio de Laval, Le Tire-Bouchon Bistro gourmand parisien, stylists Les Effrontés and the Sheraton Hotel in Laval and I'll be completing the family attractions with Mr. Max next week!

So stoked to hammer and be pampered!

Aimee

Wine Fueled Karaoke Cornballs

Here's Tara and I practicing singing Karaoke for Job 8, which will be hosting a sing along at a retirement home for charity.  It must have been 40 degrees Celsius in Montreal that day, but we beat the heat with some fruity German white wines:



We sing and everyone wins!

Happy Friday!!!!!!


Aimee

Edupunks and Edupreneurs

I was pleasantly surprised last night when I Googled my name (you know you do it too!) to find out that my humble project has been immortalized in the book, "DIY U: Edupunks, Edupreneurs and the Coming Transformation of Higher Education", by Anya Kamenetz. The mention on  page 139 can be read here:



IN JOBS FROM AROUND THE WEB:

I found an insightful comment on a Salon.com entertainment article, "I was Betty Draper", about the oft alienating effects of working from home:

"Working from home"

I'm not a housewife (I'm single) but I work from home, and I know that life without an office, without daily deadlines, can be really tough. It's easy to feel like you don't really have a job or a purpose. Other people look down on you, mistakenly thinking your lack of structure means you don't really do anything, and you must have an easy stress-free life. You feel like a slacker, like a slob in your pajamas. It's very hard to stay disciplined, and then you feel like you're lazy and wasting the day. The total lack of structure, and the isolation of spending your days alone at home, can be really depressing.

I wonder if the loneliness and isolation is part of why we both become obsessed with a television show -- maybe it's because we don't have a real cast of characters that we see at the office every day.

—Kelly Q

I can identify with Kelly's experience of working from home.  Even though "One Hundred Jobs" is a very social project, when I am producing and editing my content from home at all hours of the day, sometimes I feel like I'm a self-indulgent slacker who is quasi-employed.  In reality, it's 1 a.m. and I am still writing this entry (despite its time stamp of yesterday) and oh, I just spent three hours tonight viewing and editing down video of my Karaoke practice with Tara Hunt for Job 8 and oh, I'm prepping to participate in YouTube's "Life in a Day" 24 hour global documentary project on Saturday.  I never stop.

I might work weird hours in a thong and have no regular coworkers other than my bunny, but I am certainly no stranger to heaps of hard work.  Because we are social beings who seek validation from the actions of our peer group, defying cultural norms about "real work" and challenging the increasingly dated concept of working from 9-5 can make a person feel inadequate.  To combat my "freelancer's insecurity", I try to remind myself that I am part of the elite class of professionals who has the freedom to define their own schedule and working conditions.

I'd like to get some of your feedback: Do you work from home?  If so, do you often feel lonely and out of the loop with the "real world"?  Does telecommuting make you feel like a punk? Is the 9-5 lifestyle so 20th century?

I'll be back tomorrow with my karaoke practice video and talk about some leads on potential new jobs,


Aimee

P.S.  This edupunk is hosting a Tweet-up on August 7 at Oka Beach.  Mark it down and send all comments to #OkaTweetup on the Twitterverse.

Great Grumpy's, Barman!

Finally, here is the video from Job 48: Bartending at Grumpy's Bar, located at 1242 Bishop Street in Montreal:



Ram, my boss for the evening, who is the manager and head bartender, wanted me to point out that Grumpy's focuses on local independent music and is a little known hotbed for Montreal's stand-up comedic talents. Past staff members have included members of The United Steelworkers of Montreal, Ladies of the Canyon, The Dress Whites and The Unsettlers.  Also, the night I was working, some comics showed up from Just For Laughs to do a couple of hilarious 5 minute sets!  Spectacular AND a friendly atmosphere.  I loved it and I will be going back to hang out there sometime soon.

Have a cold one for me this evening and PLEASE SHARE MY GREAT STRIDEA WITH YOUR FRIENDS AND GET THEM TO VOTE. I'll even throw in some gum WHEN I win.


Aimee

Help Aimee Win $10 000 For Her Great Stridea!

Great news: I have been selected as a finalist for Stide Gum's Big Stridea Contest to win $10 000 for completing my 100th job.  Please vote for me here:

http://www.bigstridea.ca/entry/C833

Only 1 vote per e-mail address and IP, but my eternal love is guaranteed.

All I have to say about this amazing, once in a lifetime, fated opportunity is...

Double.Rainbow.All.The.Way.Across.The.Sky.Wow.Wow.Ohmygod.



IN OTHER JOBS:

I'm still working on the video from my Grumpy's bartending job.  Hopefully by tomorrow evening it will be complete; I'm having a lot of problems with the sound, as my microphone picked up mostly background noise and unfortunately most of the footage was shot in very low bar light, unlike the INTENSE Double Rainbow video that inspired the autotuned parody above:



It's starting to look like a triple rainbow, people.


AimeeOHMYGOOOOOOODDDD!!!!!

Deadlines are Lifelines

To pair with my upcoming employment intelligence videos, I'm starting a new section of my blog called "100% Job Tips" and will dish out working intelligence weekly.  Feel free to debate in the comments.


100% JOB TIPS:

Have you ever heard of Parkinson's Law? It's a humorous adage that states "work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion."

How does Parkinson's Law relate to deadlines? My theory is that if you set a deadline, especially a tight one with concrete consequences, you favorably capitalize on Parkinson's Law, by reducing procrastination and perfectionism. 

I am sure you have had the experience of getting a deadline in college for a term paper 2 months before it is due.  I am also willing to bet that 90% of the time you didn't start writing until a week a day two hours before the 1 500 word masterpiece was due.  However, I am willing to bet if you received the topic a week before the due date, and the paper counted for 90% of your mark, rest assured you would write a killer essay on time.  I'm typically overly ambitious in goal setting to stay on top of the continuous flow of tasks related to 100 Jobs, and my internal consequences (or intrinsic motivation) are clear: if I don't keep working, I fear my project will fail, as I am the only one responsible for its success.

Perfectionism is also a great time killer.  By worrying that our ideas are not good enough, we refuse to make the necessary decisions needed to take action.  If you only have a couple of days to come up with a killer presentation to land a large client, you are much more likely to be motivated to make quick, strategic, intuitive, and creative decisions to complete your task on time, potentially even producing higher quality work than aiming for a fluid deadline several months down the line and mulling over the perfect pitch (which doesn't exist).  Deadlines are lifelines because they foster creativity and enable confident decision making.

My 100% job tip: set a tight deadline, impose consequences, quell perfectionism, boost creativity and accomplish more at work.

LINKS:

Concise Financial Post article on the power of intuition.
Article on Strategic Intuition by William Duggan.
Image streaming technique for super charged creativity by FinerMinds.


Without the last minute nothing would get done? True or false?


Aimee (posted 10 minutes before going to meet Hamza to deliver his footage :)

Job 32: Japanese Trains

Despite combating an annoying summer cold this weekend, I put in a solid 12 hours editing and completed Job 32: editing Hamza Kubba's train travel videos from his 7 week trip to Japan.

Japan is a stunningly beautiful country: lush countryside, beautiful verdant green and snow capped mountains, neat little villages, gorgeous suburbs, and bustling modern cities.  I got bit by a Japanese travel bug while editing the video.  Maybe some travel may figure into Season 2 of 100 Jobs... ;)

I tried to capture the hypnotic feeling of train travel, and explore the varied landscapes of Japan.  The video is set to Montreal based experimental symphonic pop band Sweet Mother Logic's song "Counting Sheep".  They granted permission for us to use their music in the video.  I hope the video becomes a hit on YouTube for everyone's sake!

The video is best watched with headphones while chilling out:



Enjoy,


Aimee

10 Signs You Are TGIF

1. You know that it is exactly 4 hours, 53 minutes and 10 seconds until you get to go home.

2. You are checking Facebook more than your Inbox AND you are more productive there. Hi Braaaaaddd...

3. Every phone call you take you have to remind yourself to "put a smile in your voice" despite having a scream in your head.

Image via Zazzle.ca

4. You drink more coffee than you can handle to burn through the day and justify frequent bathroom escapes breaks.

5. You use YouTube for research for an upcoming pitch and wind up with this:



And this:



6. The above does not distress you. At all.

7. You think this is funny. You forward it to your entire office. It's not 1997:

Image via Suelovelabu.blogspot.com

8. You wish you had this guy's job.

9. You do more research on YouTube.  You send this to your client:

.
The above does not distress you. At all.

10. Instead of wrapping up your video edits, you write this list, find it funny and forward it to all of your friends.  

It's not 1997,

Aimee

Where Everybody Knows Your Name

Grumpy's was seriously awesome. As one of its patrons admitted in a hushed voice, Grumpy's friendly community of warmhearted regulars is reminiscent of the Cheers' theme song:



I'm proud to say that I performed fairly well at my job: I had the sociable bartender bit down almost immediately and after a few fifteen failed attempts, I mastered the art of pouring pints on tap.

For the uninitiated, to pour a perfect pint, you need to tilt the pint glass 45 degrees, pull the lever without hesitation all the way forward, and gradually ease up about 1/2 inch from the top, to allow for a nice, creamy head, and to avoid over spill (or excessive surging). With the art of pouring pints, there is no room for wimpy gradual pours or going for it halfway.  At first, I had a tendency to be too girlie and conservative with pulling the lever, which resulted in me having to ditch a lot of the foam into the sink.  That sounded funny...

I found a good YouTube video on how to pour a thicker stout ale, "How to Pour Guinness", which gives a nice overview of how to pour a pint:



This "pouring a pint from the bottle" video is also awesome, if only for the adorable young lad and big, enthusiastic chug at the end:



I never quite made friends with the red beer, or rousse, as they call it in Quebec. Very carbonated and unfriendly to pour, if oh so delicious.

Speaking of yummy, the only drink I sold off of my drink list was the cilantro, lime, tequila and beer cocktail, for $6.00, to a peppy theater student.  I also had the first shot of Jameson Whiskey that I appreciated in years, "a warm, buttery burn," as my badass boss put it.

 Ram: my seriously badass boss. Also a member of the band 'The Unsettlers'.

Ah, drunken memories: the last time I did a whiskey shot, it was 1998, Canadian Club and I immediately vomited up the two ounces I downed, while trying to impress my really lame boyfriend who liked to make out to U2. *shudder*

Another great thing about Grumpy's is its prices: $4.00 pints and $4.00 Jameson shots on Tuesday, and $5.50 pints of premium local. Who can't afford to get drunk at those prices?

I'll post the video of my job tomorrow,


Aimeethebartender

P.S.  One bartender fail: I was so tired yesterday that I fell asleep at 9 p.m. before I could post this.  My parental hours do not mesh with the late night bartender lifestyle.

Swim to Japan

 No-one wanted the shirt; they wanted the woman.

I have another replacement job booked, this time for Job 32, formerly known as selling custom 100 Jobs t-shirts. For the brand new, Job 32 (rhymes!), I will be editing the travel video of an artist I met at District101.  He has 3 hours of footage that he shot while he was traveling in Japan and he wants to condense it to a 5 to 10 minute clip.  I will be doing that for him later on this week to replace the non-existent 100 Jobs merchandise that no one wants and, of course, publish the breathtaking Japan travel video on my 100 Jobs Youtube Channel. (Please subscribe and give hefty doses of thumbs!)

IN JOBS FROM AROUND THE WEB:

I came across this remarkable woman, Diana Nyad, on Jezebel.com and wanted to share:



Diana wants to swim from Florida to Cuba for the second time in her life (the first time in she attempted the swim in 1979 she had to quit 42 hours in due to bad weather), a journey that should last 60 hours straight.  What she is doing is remarkable for a person of any age, let alone a woman who just celebrated her 60th birthday.  She'll be battling weather, waves, mental and physical exhaustion, the corrosive effects of saltwater and possibly sharks on her journey.  And I thought parading around in a unitard and fending off cyber pervs was a big deal!

Nyad is very much inspiring me to continue to stay in shape throughout my life, pursue my dreams and projects with relentless gusto, and much more importantly, try to accomplish more with 100 Jobs that is remarkable and worth sharing.  I need to do so much more within the scope of this project that will make a difference in the world!  That is partly why I'll be releasing a series of employment intelligence videos, starting next week, in hopes that my lessons learned in doing this project can benefit others seeking employment.

What are you doing that sets you apart in your career or your life? How are you relentless and remarkable?


Aimee (Tonight, I'll be serving up Twitter Crap at Grumpy's Bar! lol)

Barman, fix me a drink!

Unfortunately, my piece did not sell at District101's "Hang One" art sale. :( That means that the bartender job tomorrow at Grumpy's Bar, located at 1242 Bishop, will take the place of Job 48!  Please feel free to drop by for a drink with me tomorrow night (Tuesday) and take in the multitude of acts during their eclectic and electric weekly open mike night:

To beat the heat, and flex my bartender muscles, I'm going to whip up a drink list of 100 Jobs signature cocktails. Ram, Grumpy's usual bartender, tells me that Grumpy's is more of a "beer and whiskey" crowd, so I'm keeping that in mind with my sassy little 8 drink line-up:

DRINK 1: "Fresh and Frisky" - Beer and Cilantro Cocktail : beer, cilantro, tequila, simple syrup and a huge hangover!

DRINK 2: "Banana Bombshell" - Light beer and a shot of banana liqueur: sweet and sexy.

DRINK 3: "Blood, Sweat and Beers" - A hot sauce, lime and beer cocktail snagged from Epicurious.com

Happy Mich from Epicurious.com

DRINK 4: "Candy Pants" - I borrowed this mix from Whisky Magazine online.  Whiskey, cherry brandy and maybe a few gratuitous maraschinos and with a great name like that, who needs pants?

DRINK 5: "Apple Ginger Winner" - Inspired by the "Ginger Spin" cocktail at Fressen Vegan Restaurant in Toronto, Ontario - Ice, whiskey, raw apple juice, ginger and a kiss.

DRINK 6: "Call It A Sick Day" - Pale ale and a shot of whiskey, otherwise known as a Boilermaker.

DRINK 7: "Sissy Drink" - A packet of crystal light, soda and a shot of vodka, clocking in at 75 calories and plenty of drunk for your 110 pounds.

DRINK 8:  "Twitter Crap" - Blue curacao, vodka, soda, with a whole whackload of grenadine syrup at the bottom, for your ego. Can be ordered as a double if you tweet your order to me, while I'm working @onehundredjobs, loser. Special bonus for the Foursquare supergeeklosers (like me).

Bottoms up and see you tomorrow night, I hope!  RSVP on www.facebook.com/onehundredjobs, please!

Sexe et Santé,


Aimee

Paid Girlfriend?

IN JOBS THAT SHOULD JUST GO AWAY:

Here is yet another post on Craigslist written by an "influential" man who claims to want to be a "benefactor" for a hot piece of ass model.  I'm not sure why "mentor" is capitalized in the original advertisement.

upscale Mentor/benefactor available for female model

---

Date: 2010-07-10, 2:40PM EDT
Reply to: gigs-jm4np-1835904064@craigslist.org ^{[Errors when replying to ads?]}

---

Los Angles Entertainment Industry Exec here. I'm attractive, 100% legit, and have a LOT to offer. I will be extremely helpful & generous with the right girl.

Send a pic or 2 & intro if interested in more info.

• it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
• Compensation: . 

--

I actually took 5 minutes of my post-beach Saturday and wrote him back.  This is my letter to the "Exec":

Subject: Benefactor? 

Okay, normally I would tear your kind of posting apart on my blog, but
I am going to be all compassionate here and ask why?  Why do you need
to hire a model to meet your sexual and romantic needs?  Why can't you
just go out to a club and pick up a girl who wants a "rich benefactor"
a.k.a. sugardaddy?  Is it a power thing?

--

I have yet to receive a reply, but his post inspired me to deconstruct the job posting of "paid girlfriend".

The first assumption I would make about men that hire their mates is that they are seeking a woman far above their level of attractiveness and/or far below their age.   If they can't attract what they want, they try to pay for it.

The second assumption I would make is that these men believe they remove the need to be emotionally present for their partners by employing them.  The men get intimacy and the "girlfriend experience" without the emotional responsibility.  They may also absolve themselves of guilt about neglecting, cheating on and/or mistreating their paid girlfriend by the arrangement being primarily economic. They likely identify with the phrase, "it's just business."

The third assumption I would make is that some men with money genuinely get off on objectifying their dates to the point of being paid possessions. They purchase a hot date much in the same way they would a luxury vehicle: they feel entitled to "the best" and can afford to purchase their material fantasies.  A paid girlfriend is the same as a trophy wife, without the pretext of love.

The fourth assumption I would make is that such a man is so emotionally insecure that he needs to pay a woman to be by his side so that she can't or won't leave him, unless he says so.  He holds the emotional power because he pays the bills and this reassures his fragile ego.

The fifth assumption I would make that it's all about power.  The man pays the bills; he calls the shots.  Your employer hires you for a position; they dictate the requirements for such a position.

The sixth, and final assumption I would make is that the desire to be a model's benefactor when you are an established professional is fueled by fairy tales. It's a perverted reenactment of a romantic narrative wherein the weak woman is rescued and helped by a rich and powerful benefactor. The arrangement is part Pygmalion, part Cinderella and many heaps "Pretty Woman."

If I pay you, will you love me?

My hope for these men is that they heal themselves emotionally and learn to love reciprocally, if they can. However, I think my wish is equally the stuff of fairy tales, minus the perversion.


Aimee.

Escape Mediocrity

IN JOBS FROM AROUND THE WEB:

I clicked over to author and speaker Julien Smith's cerebral and challenging blog, "In Over Your Head", and read a post entitled, "Making Yourself Unemployable".  

In his post, Smith explores a phenomenon that I, and likely most entrepreneurs, fully embrace: you get what you accept in your professional life.  If you pick a job that is dissimilar to your ultimate career, and find ways to rationalize (or medicate) sticking at a job that is defies your raison d'être, you will never achieve greatness professionally.  To put it in Dr. Phil-like terms, you won't get to the moon by aiming at your foot.

Smith writes,

I used to find big, comfy jobs very seductive. I remember getting hired at Fido in 2002 and thinking “This is a big brand, a well-paying job, this could really work for me.” The idea of finding your place is seductive and it’s very easy to get lulled into a sense of having “arrived.”
I thought about this as I chatted with the teller. I could have been her. She looked really happy working here. She had been chosen among numerous applicants. Her employer puts her in a kind of prestigious position. I remembered applying for bank jobs before, and how it made me feel to possibly be a part of that team.

That isn’t what happened to me, though. Laziness set in. I almost got laid off repeatedly because I hated it. This is what happens to most people, I’m guessing. They slack off and coast and, as a result, stop getting promoted. They get put into a position where they’re no longer advancing. They settle.

The thing that kept me out of this was being on the web in a really significant way. I saw alternatives (podcasting at the time) that were different from what I was doing or what my parents taught me, a different form of upward mobility that relied on my wits and ability to create content and compete. This helped me let go of the safe job. I eventually reached what some people would call escape velocity and got out for good.

I wrote in the comments (which are worth reading as well) that I’ve always believed that in your professional life you get both what you expect AND accept. Settle for less and you’ve settled. (unless you’re accepting less temporarily in pursuit of a greater goal ;)  Ahem, canIgetawoot100jobs, plz!

I challenge, though, Smith's clever but inaccurate premise of "making yourself unemployable" on purpose (but understand the spirit of independence and risk taking that Smith is implying) because I argue that it’s less about being unemployable in a traditional (or submissive) dynamic, but more about not settling in a job beneath your abilities, goals and desires (or dreams).  This is perhaps stating the obvious, but I think that you should only make yourself unemployable at a job that you do not want to be employed in.  Equally, and closer to Smith's thesis, you can't be employed by someone else if you want to be a self-sufficient entrepreneur.

Being an uncompromising, hard working, kick-ass risk taker, dreamer and goal setter myself, I also say that if you believe you can do better at anything in your life, then DO BETTER.  Make an escape plan, hatch it, roll with the punches, dust yourself off, rinse, repeat and reorient, tweak and persist until you get what you want.  It's the way of the solopreneur.  I'd love to ask Richard Branson what he thinks about taking risks in your career. My guess is that he made himself highly unemployable at 7-11 fairly early on.

Dreaming of the day when I achieve escape velocity, (or has it already arrived?).

Thanks, Smith,


Aimee

District 101 Art Show Tonight!

I edited together a video about District101.ca, which, as a final reminder, has an open vernissage (exhibition) tonight and features a piece that I hope to sell for Job 48:



Hope to see you there,


Aimee

P.S. Totally wish I could apply for this, but I'm too old! That's happening more and more frequently now):

Motivated participants wanted for a study ($100 compensation) (McGill/Montreal Neuro)

---

Date: 2010-07-08, 12:30PM EDT
Reply to: job-fwkjk-1832016743@craigslist.org

---

We need motivated men and women, ages 18 to 30, with no history of multiple chemical sensitivity, neurological or psychiatric disease, or any other condition leading to an impaired sense of smell. Participants will be asked to come into the lab for 13 separate sessions, each 1 to 3 days apart. Ten of these sessions will involve learning to associate odors with labels. Tests of your sense of smell will be completed before, during, and after training. All sessions should last approx. 30 min. Participants who complete all 13 sessions will be compensated $100 for their time and inconvenience. If you are interested in participating or require more information, please contact Cathryn at smell.learning@gmail.com. Department of Psychology, McGill University. Supervisor’s name: Dr. Jelena Djordjevic.

• Location: McGill/Montreal Neuro
• Compensation: $100
• Principals only. Recruiters, please don't contact this job poster.
• Please, no phone calls about this job!
• Please do not contact job poster about other services, products or commercial interests.

--

Bars, Guns and Babes

I'm booked for Job 49! (I know, Job 48 is still open: I want to sell my painting at the District 101 art show conveniently located at 48 Notre Dame Ouest, Suite 101! FYI: the buzzer is silent, so be patient if you ring up to get in. The vernissage is tomorrow night.)

For Job 48, I'll be working at Grumpy's Bar next Tuesday night (July 13) from 8 p.m. until closing.  Me and the head bartender Ram are gonna whip up some mean cocktails and I'll even have a few 100 jobs themed drinks!  Please come and get your drink on!

IN OTHER JOBS:

I will not be applying for either of these job offers, as I'm not a big fan of deadly weapons and would much rather see a world without guns:

Experienced knife sharpener needed (Laval)

---

Date: 2010-07-07, 1:09PM EDT
Reply to: job-fwhue-1830227694@craigslist.org ^{(leaving this address in because you can apply if you are skilled!)}

---

Looking for an experienced knife/blade sharpener.
Must be able to work with a belt sander to sharpen blades.
Experience in edge angles.
Very flexible schedule. 1 or 2 days / week.
15$ hour.

• Location: Laval,
• Compensation: 15?/ hour

--

Not bad, not bad, if I didn't have a mortal fear of knives.  However, $15 per hour better involve some workers' compensation, insurance and benefits, for those who are applying!  No fingers: no fun!

NEXT!

This ad falls apart at the end... it's apparently O.K. for persons with disabilities?  How do you shoot and telecommute?  Why can't they go with one of their current members instead of highly feminine models, who are most likely gun shy?

Oh yeah.... guns and babes go hand in hand!

Image via ROFLRazzi.com.

Firearms council searches for models to demonstrate competition firearms (Montreal)

---

Date: 2010-07-07, 11:21AM EDT
Reply to: see below

---

Recognized professional shooting specialist is looking for a few models to demonstrate female weapons, accessories and show shooting skills for military and police.

We will be shooting image banks for our banners and advertising material (advertisements, posters, calendars, data sheets ...), for our website and video presentations and / or for the training of new products and / or visual demonstration of techniques.
 
Models: show off our firearms and learn how to shoot in a real shooting club. Come and try something different!
 
Contact BABEZWITHGUNZ@live.ca

• Location: Montreal
• Compensation: TBD
• Telecommuting is ok.
• This is a part-time job.
• This is a contract job.
• This is at a non-profit organization.
• This is an internship job
• OK to highlight this job opening for persons with disabilities
• OK for recruiters to contact this job poster.
• Phone calls about this job are ok.
• Please do not contact job poster about other services, products or commercial interests.

 --

This is as far as I'll go with gun modeling:

Yes, I always blog with a gun to my head: why do you ask?

Oh yeah, and this is some more gun play that I'm okay with, from a short film Mr. Fluffenstein that I was in, about a killer electronic cat back from the dead, which is showing at Fantasia this summer as part of Frankenstein Unlimited on July 18:



Off to edit video shot at District 101 yesterday and survive the crazy heat.

Bang bang, you're FIRED! (Ha ha ha)


Aimee

Plastic Extrusion and Job Confusion

It seems to be plastics day on One Hundred Jobs.  I just got this inappropriate job offer sent to me, specifically.  If it's because of my blog post yesterday talking about my "Plastic Bag Bondage" piece for tonight's art show opening, then the "keyword search and send" is very modern as an employee recruitment technique, but a failure due to context.  Bots still cannot replace the human beings in HR.

Incidentally, the job offer seems like a position for Oliver Davies over at 100 Unsuitable Jobs:

Looking for a challenge!

Quality Manager - Plastic Extrusion Mfg.
Management
Manufacturing/Production
Technical
• Oversee development, production and quality of products
• Supply theoretical and practical tools to ensure high quality products
• Develop operation standards, work instructions and quality control regulations
• Ensure Plant employees understand rules and regulations, and are aware of acceptable quality products
• Establish and create procedures
• Determine the necessary equipment
• Suggest methods for increasing quality of products
• Train appropriate individuals on new procedures to ensure compliance
• Maintain and improve ISO system:
o Develop control systems
o Update system with revised standards
o Create work instructions
o Rewrite instructions with new requirements as necessary
o Train employees on work instructions and systems
o Implement system programs
o Follow up on programs
• Act as link between clients and production:
o Receive and review clients' requests
o Analyze product feasibility
o Improve procedures to satisfy clients' requirements
o Oversee that implemented procedures are being carried out
o Assist with production-related problems and/or concerns
o Execute additional tasks upon request

Company Name: plastifab industries
Location: Saint-Laurent
Available: Immediately Full Time.
Pay: 55,000 per year
Posted: 7/6/2010

Visit: http://www.plastifab.ca

If anyone wants to apply, please, be my guest! Because plastics are FAB!

Flash Gordon can be bought and retrofuturism is eternal. Image via comicscomicsmag.com

IN OTHER JOBS:

Other useless non-plastic job offers:

Saw your advert on craiglist, we are seeking for a hard working person their in Canada.
 
Job Description:
• Make and dispatch payments to clients
• Its a Part time and Home based Job i.e you will be working
from your house no running around
• 1,200 monthly

Requirements:
•Must be a good Computer User
• Must be at least 18yrs Old
Company Honey Well Inc Company is a company

For consideration, please send your resume to: i_dammie_cook@yahoo.com if you are capable and willing to work with us.

I wrote back:

"Great... do I get to show my boobs?"

No response.

NEXT!

have you ever done website promotion I have several sites http://www.nbsaefjbfj.com and http://www.ksfnjsghius.com I need traffic that will click on the [totally violates this organization's policies] any ideas?

Idea 1: Make a business plan that does not involve clicks.

Idea 2: Become friends with people with $ in their avatars on Twitter.


IN LEGIT JOB OFFERS:

And just so you don't think all is lost in terms of new jobs, I am 99% confirmed on two new jobs: one for an interior design company, and another as a bartender at a rocking comedy bar next Tuesday. Details soon!

I am that close to revealing Job 50 and having that big halfway done party I've been talking about!



Plastic fantastic,


Aimee

Mean Musical Directors and New Dorks

Some people don't deserve their jobs. I called to follow up at the elderly persons residence today and the woman in charge told me she was "booked with musical acts until 2011" and "had no time" to offer me suggestions as to what other public centre needed free entertainment services. And no, she didn't even know about my blog yet. She was rushed, rude and not the type of lady I'd want taking care of the happiness of an older relative. Boo! So back to the drawing board for finding an appropriate centre for Job 8. Any suggestions?

IN JOBS FROM AROUND THE WEB:

It has been as hot as (Aimee in a Unitard: the winning answer from my Twitter game) today, so I have been slow moving and swampy-mood-ish. However, this Pantless Knight's "New Dork" video sent to me by Tara cheered me up:



Speaking of new dorks, I also read a compelling Salon.com article by Heather Havrilesky, citing Bethenny Frankel as a personal branding expert via her use of unselfconsciousness, or radical self-disclosure. As I said on my Twitter, I consider Frankel to be another You-commerce acolyte.

From the article:

[Frankel's] total lack of shame and regret, in fact, make Bethenny the ultimate personal brand for the 21st century. Hiding from the public eye, trying to keep parts of your life private, not having light-hearted rejoinders and flip explanations for everything you do – these are tantamount to embracing failure these days. The media-saturated universe wants a steady flow of soundbytes, bloopers, behind-the-scenes footage, inside scoops – the more humiliating, the better. Cooperate to feed the machine exactly the sorts of calories it wants, and watch your star rise.

I think I'm on to something with my You-commerce theory. Do you agree? Or is Frankel just another Borderline P.D. reality show famewhore princess?

IN OTHER JOBS:

Reminder: District 101's collective art show, featuring 22 Montreal artists selling works for the amazing price of $250, is on tomorrow in suite 101, 48 Notre Dame Ouest, starting at 6 p.m. I'll be there with my video camera and my clever artist statement:

“Plastic Bag Bondage"
Aimee Davison (artist) and Nico Stinghe (photographer)

Digital photography with recycled wood frame and plastic bag appliqué, sealed with polymer medium. Dimensions: 18 by 22.  

Serving as both a model and artistic director, Aimee Davison produced conceptual fashion editorials with social and political themed content, featured in three issues of Maisonneuve Magazine in 2008. Instead of creating traditional aesthetically-focused fashion editorials, Aimee merged social, environmental and political commentary with compelling clothing choices. This image, a sole first reproduction, was part of an editorial called “Enviro-mode” where Aimee used recycled clothing and accessories (like the plastic bags used in both the shoot and on the frame) to reinforce environmentally conscious quotations superimposed on each image. “Plastic Bag Bondage” explores the superficial yet enslaving excessive behaviors of North American consumers towards the environment.

Aimee’s photographic works have been featured in Maisonneuve Magazine, on Nerve.com, and shown in the city of Hampstead’s Charity Auction in 2009. Continuing her career as an artistic chameleon and muse, she is currently completing 100 jobs for a minimum of $100 each. She hopes to sell this piece and count it as Job 48. Follow her on Twitter, YouTube and Facebook with the username “onehundredjobs” or on onehundredjobs.ca.

Nico can be found at anothersidewalk.tv.


Let's hear it for you-dorks and unselfconscious art,


Aimee

Apocalypse Now

Somehow Window's Service Pack 3 mysteriously disappeared from my computer, leaving me Internet Explorer, Paint and Calculator-less. This is either a sign of the apocalypse or proof that I need a Mac. *grumbles*



I just joined Foursquare.com, which is also another sign of the apocalypse.

And finally, several horsemen of the apocalypse showed up on Craigslist this weekend, offering their usual catastrophic jobs:

Sexy Executive Assistant (downtown)

---

Date: 2010-07-04, 7:46PM EDT
Reply to: smileandlookpretty@craigslist.org

---

Looking for someone very sexy and very attractive to accompany me to social and business events in Montreal.

I'm an executive here for the summer and work for Sony Pictures Entertainment and basically seek someone who has a nice smile, good people skills and loves to dress up and look hot.  It's a part time summer job.

Please inquire for more info with photos. All expenses and time paid. All you do smile and look pretty.

• Location: downtown
• it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
• Compensation: neg. 

--

I posted this on Craigslist in response:

Dear Sony Pictures Entertainment Cog,

I wanted to inform you of the error in your recent job posting. The correct spelling of the type of part time executive assistant that you are looking for is Executive ASSistant.

My best,

OneHundredJobs.ca
Compensation offered: ASS

NEXT!

Female Host Needed (Montreal - downtown)

---

Date: 2010-07-02, 2:03PM EDT
Reply to: Notthatkindofhost@craigslist.org

---

Arriving in Montreal on the weekend of July 17th.

Looking for a female host to show us around Montreal - some bars and strip clubs

Will arrange for a limo on our end, but want someone who will be able to show us some good hot spots.

--

WELL, if there is a LIMO involved, then OF COURSE I'll take you to all of the strip clubs I have nightmares about frequent as an Executive ASSistant.

NEXT!

And just in case you also feel like crying yourself to sleep tonight, here's the Apoohcalypse:

 Pervs are everywhere, SIGH!  
 (I wish they'd lose THEIR tails!)













Oh Eeyore, NOW I know why you were so depressed all the time,


Aimee

30 Hour Day

My philanthropic and socially conscious new BFF Tara Hunt, of HorsePigCow.com, who, as you may recall, is helping me to entertain residents at a retirement home for charity during my upcoming Job #8, created the following video for another charitable organization, 30hourday.org/. 

30 Hour Day is a charity webtelethon of entertainment and interesting weblebrity interviews, broadcasted live on Ustream.tv, that benefits multiple charities, like the Oregon Food Bank and the Portland, Oregon Chapter of the American Red Cross.

As I am also eternally generous, I show up in my bikini at 2:34 and graciously act like my usual dorky self towards the 9 minute mark.  The mobilizing force of entertaining others is the best donation:



Here is the live stream of 30hourDay.org's multi-charity webcast event, going on now:



Donate if you can.  I might even throw in a bikini pic or two!  :D

IN OTHER JOBS:

I am dropping off my environmentally conscious piece of artwork that was originally published in Maisonneuve Magazine, with its custom recycled plastic bag frame, to District101's Hang Collective Art Show, tomorrow at 9 a.m.  Again, the address is #101, 48 Notre Dame Ouest, Montreal and the show runs from July 6 - 12.  All artwork is $250 and there should be at least 30 artists exhibiting their creations.  I hope mine sells so I can call it Job 48.  With Job 50 comes a party and a big surprise... so I hope it sells!

I may have a sunset photoshoot booked with a charming photographer and videographer called "SafeSolvent" on Twitter, who also charmingly said I didn't have to remove my underwearz to shoot with him... unless I wanted to.  LOL.  Thank goodness!

By the way, I really love my FreewillAstrology.com horoscope this week:

You may still be gnawed by a longing for your life to be different from what it is. You might fantasize that you're missing a crucial element that would, if acquired, usher you into a Golden Age. But I've been analyzing the big picture of your destiny, Aquarius, and here's what I see: This year you're being offered the chance to be pretty satisfied with the messy, ambiguous, fantastically rich set of circumstances that you've actually been blessed with. The first half of 2010 should have inspired you to flirt with this surprising truth. The second half will drive it home with the force of a pile of gifts left anonymously on your doorstep.

Receiver of amazing jobs and giver of bikini gifts,


Aimee

Oh Canada!

And because you have been dying to see me host a video about vocational education for the Lester B. Pearson School Board (Job 33):



Happy Canada Day!


Aimee